Sunday, August 28, 2016

Tearful At The Falling Of A Star

It feels very strange to say that I'm thirty. I felt like it was important for me to mark this occasion here, since my blog has been such a huge part of my twenties and I'm hoping it will remain so as I enter this new decade of my life. To think that I was only 23 when I started this blog, the years have gone by too quickly.

I'm feel proud to say that all my life I have always just been myself. I wasn't all that bothered with what anyone else thought of me, I dressed to please myself, listened to the music and watched the movies I loved, I never felt pressure to do anything conventional. To this day, even writing this blog I have always done my own thing, even though it's meant my blog has remained quite small throughout it's six years of existence, I'd rather have it that way and keep writing about what I want to write about.

I've been thinking a lot lately about my life and feeling like I haven't really achieved much, but I think I was doing myself a disservice. Everyone's ambitions and definitions of success are so different. It's far too easy to compare yourself to other people nowadays and it can be both very motivating and toxic at the same time. I can completely admire someone who is driven and ambitious and works 24/7 to achieve their goals but I've come to the realisation that that is not and will never be me. I work very hard at what I do and I put everything into it, I always want to do my best and make myself proud more than anything, but I also know that work isn't everything and spending time with the people I love is so important to me and I don't want to compromise on that. I feel like I finally have as close to a healthy balance as I'll ever get and I'm really happy with that.

I have done a lot in my thirty years, I've completed my education, I've moved house lots of times, I've had two interviews in my life and gotten both jobs, I've stayed up all night talking to someone I love, I've watched a LOT of films, been to a lot of gigs, I've travelled more in the past 2 years than I have in the previous 27. I've become an Aunt to the most beautiful little girl, I've been the face of an international make up campaign for a brand I love. I won an award for best fashion/beauty blog at the Irish Blog Awards. I've made many friends and sadly lost touch with some too. I've watched people I love pass away. I've had my heart broken, I've fallen in love, I've taught myself many things. I've done things I regret and regretted things I didn't do. I stood beside my sister at her wedding. I've danced all night, cried over boys, had too much to drink on nights out, eaten the most amazing food, watched Six Feet Under late at night when I was supposed to be asleep. Watched The Goonies more times than I can remember, I named my youngest brother, made up dance routines to Spice Girls songs (I was always Baby Spice), got surprisingly good results in my leaving cert exams, I've stood up for myself and others as much as I could and I danced on the beach in the rain with my best friend

I never had any significant dreams or ambitions when I was younger, I really don't think I was ever your typical little girl. I didn't dream of being a ballerina or a pop singer or what my wedding dress would look like or having babies. As I got older I wasn't obsessed with getting a boyfriend or traveling the world or underage drinking. All I really wanted in life was to be healthy and happy and laugh a lot and I've done just that (apart from some recent health issues). 

There is still so much I want to do with my life, so many things spring to mind immediately I won't even try to start naming everything. My main goals are to continue to live my life as fully as I can, to say yes to exciting and challenging opportunities, to push myself to learn new things and experience more of the world and to try and be a good and positive person and help people as much as I can. 

And if you're still reading, here are some photos of what I wore on my birthday. 

CG14 CG8 CG5 CG11 CG3 CG4 CG12 CG16

Top- Dunnes Stores Savida Star Mesh Top
Skirt- Zara Tulle Skirt
Shoes- ASOS Switch It On Pointed Heels
Earrings- Topshop
Ring- Stella and Dot Eden Ring (currently sold out)
Lipstick- Charlotte Tilbury Red Carpet Red
Nails- Essie On a Silver Platter

My party was very casual in a local bar so I didn't want anything too dressy but I still wanted something new and pretty. I started with the shoes which I saw on someone I follow on Instagram a few months ago and went on ASOS straight away to order them. Sadly they were out of stock for ages so when I finally saw they were back in my size AND on sale I was thrilled and bought them immediately. I never wear high heels because I have problems with my feet so these low block heels give just enough height to make me feel a bit more dressed up, I'll definitely be bringing these out for events to dress up jeans or more casual outfits.

I wanted some kind of tulle skirt and when I started looking around online they seemed to be everywhere. I got this one for a bargain price of €29.95 in Zara, it also comes in a pale blue shade. I plan on wearing this in the winter with ankle boots and a jumper to make it more cold weather appropriate.

I was going to just wear a grey or white t-shirt with the skirt to keep the outfit more casual but then I saw this top in Dunnes while out shopping with my sister about a week before my birthday. I brought the skirt into town with my the next day to try on with the top and I loved how they looked together. I included some photos below of how I wore the outfit on the night of my party and then a bit more dressed down on my actual birthday. Please excuse the "there's a car coming" face, it's the only photo I got of my outfit on the night!

OB Collage

Thanks for reading this long, personal post. They're a rare occurrence these days, but I felt like sharing a bit more since it was a special occasion. 

Emma x

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